I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
