Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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