so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize