Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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