Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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