my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
