There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
