Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
