Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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