Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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