Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
