I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
