Moan for me like Helen Keller
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize