I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize