All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize