My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
