I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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