sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize