So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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