question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
