Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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