New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
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