No, you can still breathe under the balls.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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