I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
