Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
