what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
