College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize
