Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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