Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
