i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
