Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
