Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize