Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
