No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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