would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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