can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
