I'm going to jail i love you
...so i touched it.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
The adults are the big ones right?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
