worst night to have a conscience
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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