Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
