Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
3 2 1 whiskey
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
