Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
