Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
