walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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