Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize