who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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