in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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