i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
