His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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