is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize