What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
