Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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