I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
did i just pee glitter
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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